Friday, August 27, 2004

Random Olympic thoughts III

* There's no way the makeup artist for the U.S. women's gymnastics team isn't from New Jersey. I don't care what evidence you show to prove otherwise, I'm claiming a false positive. Did you see the glitter and the eye makeup. I thought I was at Illusions in Mahwah or Trade Winds in Belmar, or any other Jersey Shore club from Al Q, your club and concert calendar.

* Playing the part of Tommy "The Machine" Gunn in the remake of Rocky V is . . . Paul Hamm. Marketing tagline: He's got the gold, but no one thinks he's the champ. Plot summary: Bela Karolyi goes turncoat and defends the South Korean bronze medalist. At Hamm's local gym, Karolyi and the South Korean bronze medalist start berating Hamm. In subtitles, the South Korean bronze medalists says, "The judged knocked me down to third place, why don't you try knocking me down now."

* Rulon Gardner leaving his shoes in the middle of the ring to signal his retirement is insanely cool, even if it is the sport of Greco-Roman wrestling. He ranks second on the "How to retire cool" list, behind John Kruk who singled in his last at-bat then walked off the field and retired on the spot.

* I yearn for the day when someone from Lane 8 wins a medal, or even a qualifying heat.

* Where and when do gymnastics color commentators get the broadcast experience?

* I didn't know how exciting Olympic canoeing could be until Wednesday. I went to the gym, turned my FM dial to 89.7 to pick up the audio from one of the televisions near the treadmill. Then, i went to the ab machines, which present an obstructed point of view, i.e. they face the complete opposite direction. Luckily, I could stay in tune with the races.

* Starbury is the third best Olympic nickname behind Thorpedo and Tomba La Bamba, even if Starbury was created in Coney Island 10 years ago. He's an Olympian, so he fits the criteria for this list.

* Abby Wambach seems like she'd be a fun drinking partner at the Boardie Barn.

* If I hear one more television "journalist" ask a gold medalist how she or he feels about winning a gold medal, I may be forced to watch Da Ali G show and I really don't want to have to do that. First day of J-school: "Don't ever ask people how they feel about winning or losing something!" Guess NBC "journalists" were sick that day. I wonder how they felt.

* One question about rhythmic gymnastics: why?

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