Thursday, October 14, 2004

Random ALCS Thoughts

* How would Game 2 have been chronicled if not for Pedro's "call them my daddies" quote three weeks ago? Likely, "Who's your daddy?" would have remained behind closed doors, where it's most effective.

* I wish the sports editor of returned my e-mail. I would have enjoyed being part of one of those city-to-city bets, like when the mayors of each city place a friendly wager involving geographically specific commodities.

* Oh how I yearned this evening for a current Yankee named Cane or Kane or anything similar in sound or spelling. I could have written the headline "Big Daddy Kane" or a reasonable facsimile thereof to honor to Prince of Darkness and old-school rap legend. What the heck, it is the 30th anniversary of hip-hop.

* Jack Nicholson, Conan O'Brien, Lorne Michaels and Penny Marshall were photographed together at the Stadium in what appeared to be exceptional seats. How is this possible? None of them are on Fox. Somewhere, Rupert Murdoch is pummeling a network executive for not filling up those seats with the women of "Boston Public."

* Tom Gordon is doing nothing to help disprove the "Never trust a guy with a mustache" theory. (For the record, Tom Skerritt's Viper in "Top Gun" is the only exception to this rule),

* How long after the ALCS until the suckers who bought all the "daddy" paraphernalia wish they had their money back?

* I watched both games on mute, so I'm pretty sure I didn't miss anything meaningful being said by Tim McCarver.

* The Red Sox lose to the Yankees in the Bronx, Pedro fails again, Schilling could be done for the series, Rivera dominates again, the NHL misses out on opening night because of its lockout, and the Jets don't lose a game. Is there a more Utopian sports night . . . that doesn't involve Jennie Finch or Maria Sharapova?

* It must really be painful growing up a Bostonian baseball fan. No wonder they like hockey so much up there.

* I miss ubiquitous, gratuitous J. Lo shots during the games. Oh well. I know a few Internet sites that can help with that.

* Sometimes I wish Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake would run out to centerfield, slap a sleeper hold on Johnny Damon, then shave his head, just like the old days of 1992 WWF.

* When does the brawl start?

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